#NewMom #HelpingProfessional

A week ago from today I was at a camp my job hosts for youth in foster care that happens every year. I have been involved with camp since I was an undergrad intern at UAB, but this year was different. This year I had to leave my 2 month old baby boy at home and venture out to work for an entire 4 days without seeing him and work my butt off to pour into other kiddos. IT. WAS. HARD!

I knew it would be, but things were just so overwhelmingly new. I mean everything was new! Every once in a while I would look through pictures on my phone of him and want to just cry. But I knew for certain I was doing something good, that I was making a difference in the lives of other kiddos, that I was totally in boss mode, owning it and doing a great job, but truthfully I wanted to be home with my nugget. So how did I do it? Not easily, but I survived. Coming back to work after having Nehemiah was definitely tougher than I imagined. I FEEL different. i feel like I need to be with him more and don't necessarily feel guilty but just have a feeling of I can't wait to get back with him and his dad and spend time with my family. I still am very much invested in the kiddos I work with but my mind has shifted in priority that Nehemiah needs me more.

Either way, I had to find some internal and external assistance to help me get through the week. So for all my fellow new moms out there or moms who just had babies are going back into the helping professional world, here is how I helped myself through this tough week last week.

1. Lean on my support system

Man, my parents and my husband are rock stars in this department. My husband video calling me out of the blue with Nehemiah on the phone were just my favorite moments and he would update me here and there. My parents being open to Nehemiah coming to stay with them in the city we were in, giving my husband some space AND allowing me to rush to them to see my baby boy as soon as camp was over! I am also so extra grateful to my co workers who would check on me from time to time to make sure I was good! It all just made the week just a little bit better despite how I was feeling about it all!

2. Know your limits

There was a certain time in the week, around late evening Wednesday night that I just needed a moment to decompress and take a break from everything. Camp can be an extra stressful time and most of the time there are time periods in other helping professions, for example when nurses and doctors have back to back codes or a psychiatrist or counselor has a client visit who is in a high anxiety situation and needs to be calmed down or a teacher has a student that is disrupting the class all day. Those are the moments when you miss your baby the most and having to go back to work so soon, adds to that stress level. So we just have to know when we have reached a point where we are too on edge to be effective.

3. Communicate how you are feeling

My number one suggestion is to lean on your support system, but you cannot lean on your support system if you don't have a way to express how your feeling. At the beginning of the camp week I was saying "I don't want to talk about it" but by the end of the second day, I was definitely needing to share my feelings with someone. I am again SO grateful for my husband and my mom who really were able to hear me out and check in with me when I was feeling most insecure about leaving nugget in the first place, which I am sure is a lot of mom/dad guilt when you have a newborn for more people other than me.

These are the main ways I cared for myself in the week away from my baby boy. The challenge? I have another week in July AND and week in August where I have to prepare myself for something similar and in August I will be all the way in Florida! I will let you all know how it goes! All in the life of a #newmom #helpingprofessional Taking one step at a time!